31-01-21

Solitude is the gift that keeps on giving, once You come to this realization.
Once You have the space to be who You are, the time passes differently.
If You practice mindfulness and or meditate, the space to be is freedom.
There is a inner peace that arrives once the monkey mind is shut down.
If You feel stuck, get curious.
The are so many possibilites to explore, and having some quiet time is the perfect time for uninterrupted personal reflection...

30-01-21

Did You know that how You think affects outcomes?
What You believe to be influences your decision making.
It influences your relationships with others.
And is an indicator to the relationship You have with yourself.
Your truth and owning your own story are the building blocks of a better understanding as to why things are they way they are.
Your mindset determines your approach for what comes next.
Will You continue to be upset, or open your mind to hope.
Choose wisely...

29-01-21

Believe in the power of visualization.
There is magic in the way You envision things.
There is Law of Attraction.
There is empowering yourself, by setting the stage to build your better life.
See yourself there, and summon possibility.
It's really not that hard to do...

28-01-21

Perception is everything.
Realize that there is more here than meets the eye.
Recognize that it is only in how You see it.
Will life move forward? Or will You stay stuck?
There are questions beyond the questions.
Just as there is more than one answer.
Be solutions oriented in your problem solving.
There can be meaning attached to places, events, situations.
If You decided it was happening to You, a way will eventually be made clear.
If You decided it was happening to You, blame and revenge might be the next choices.
Choose to grow. Choose to heal.
Choose to be mindful...

27-01-21

There is no white knight.
No one is coming to save You...

When I was a little girl, I was told a lie.
In the heat of anger, I was told that I had an older brother.
Which was a surprise to me.
I waited years for him to surface.
In my mind, I wished for him to come and take me away from the cruelty that was my home life, and take me with him, to my real family.
The family that loved me.
Truth is, lies like this become imbeded in your way of thinking, til it is undone.
The good news is, we live in a time where information is easily available.
Resources, therapists, workshops, support groups are all easily accessible nowadays.
Make the choice to heal that old trauma.
Make the choice to build a better life. Give yourself permission to do what it takes.
There is freedom in peace...

26-01-21

Self trust is so important as You build your best life.
Self doubt is the negative voices from your upbringing, the culture and the world at large.
In these narcissistic, toxic times it's best to cultivate truth in your life.
Knowing who You are and ignoring those other messages are key.
My mother insisted I was 'the most useless and stupid' person she had ever known.
Pure projection intent on sabotaging my sense of self.
Don't go there, if there is a damaging, toxic message in your psyche.
Strive for healing. Letting go.
And, as in the case of my biological, it's always recommeded to go 'no contact'.
Live your best life and have inner peace, freedom to choose.
Listen to the tiny voice inside as You develop your own version of self trust...

25-01-21

Don't believe what they tell You. You know exactly who you are...
Before I knew better, I believed what they told me.
That of all the children, I was the most stupid.
That I'd never amount to anything.
Took years to heal and create self-esteem.
Abuse does alter how You see yourself.
Be your own witness.
Overcome the paralyzing inner dialogue that resulted from being told You are NO thing.
Not worthy. Yet, You are that and so much more.
Tell you own story.
Remember who You are, and find your way on the path to being You...

24-01-21

Yes! Yes, You can easily begin now.
Spark your creativity and be inspired.
Watch a movie.
Pick up a book (or two).
Start an on-line course.
Visit the library on-line.
Make a plan ot two.
Talk with a good Friend.
Journal your thoughts and feelings.
Create your Gratitude List.
Create your vision board.
Find the thing that brings You joy. Do that.
Plant some idea seeds and watch what happens next...

23-01-21

Life is not some zero-sum game.
Nor is it toil. (Although, yes there have been times when it most certainly feels like it).
It is really up to You as to what it all means.
It's joyful, tragic, magic, grueling, and sometimes sad.
We love, we lose, we endure and we overcome.
For Creatives, it's about the art. The music. The script. The novel.
Be a witness to life itself.
Keep learning. Keep forgiving.
Find what resonates. Do that, then do it some more...

22-01-21

Let's say You know things that others do not.
This insider info, if You will, is key to being the best You can be.
Being the best version of yourself will allow You to make better and wiser choices as You begin to build a better life for yourself.
Make 2021 your break through year to live your best life.
Add self love...

21-01-21

If You reflect upon all You have lived through, this makes sense.
Especially lately.
Find your tribe.
Family may not be all it's cracked up to be.
Time to value, You.
This list is all You need...

20-01-21

My love for books is no secret amongst those who know me.
We were denied books in the family I grew up in. My abusive, fear-based parents did not allow knowledge, world view or facts into our lives.
I had so many questions that needed answering.
There were no computers or Internet in those days.
The library was a place of solace. There I could read, research and discern fiction from reality. From there, my love of words grew.
It was Christina Crawford's memoir, Mommie Dearest that validated and clued me into what child abuse was.

Books helped me save myself from despair.
Books gave me language for what was going on around me.
My home is now filled with books.
Like having Teachers, Guardians, Friends and Mentors all at my disposal...

19-01-21

So, what's next for You?
Ready to take a risk?
Prefer to break change and tasks into small chunks?
Maybe just grab a pen and paper or your journal and write your way through it.
Is it time to follow up on that long lost dream?
Enroll in that course?
Read that book?
Whatever You do to move forward can begin now.
Tiny steps, a conversation, a sketch, a few lines.
It all begins with You...

18-01-21

Some things just are.
For me, it serves no purpose to complain about them.
Or take a victim stance.
Mindfulnesss adopts a curiousity around why I am feeling this way. I can identify the triggers and choose to move away from the scenario or make a different choice around how I will respond to the drama.
I will practice a neutral, loving compassion where I can.
I will detach and perhaps let You go.
I do not need to inform You how I arrived at this decision.
I empower myself in the doing.
I send You love.
You get to decide what it then means for You...

17-01-21

To me, encounters with soul mates are so healing and that is where the magic is...
It's a knowing. Pure connection, as if recognizing someone from a past life.
They stay for as long as is needed, then they may go away.
Once the energetic union is complete, we make our way to other new soul experiences.
Or not...

16-01-21

When they use You, You are 50% accountable.
I learn more about people when I discover that his may be who they really are.
I have suffered fools gladly when I did not know better.
I have loved damaged people.
I have rescued damaged people.
Mostly because I know what it is like to have no support, no resources and to be alone.
However, having said that...I have also fallen victim to narcissists, sociopaths, energy vampires and toxic individuals using this blanket method.
At the end of the day, we are who we are. Boundaries and trusting your instincts are crucial.
I have learned that I may have attracted certain situations by being complcit.
I have learned that I need to heal from the complex PTSD, so as to not encounter those that automatically trigger me.
Most importantly, I have found tools like the grey rock method, letting go and going no contact have been the most helpful while detaching from the drama others bring.
And now, that I know better...I make wiser choices.
When they show You who they are, believe them the first time and walk away.

15-01-21

Life really is what you make of it.
We are the stories we tell ourselves.
Why not lean towards a more positive spin on things?
Why not take a less serious stance, maybe even invite a humourous view?
How You cope. how You build resilience is a skill set.
Develop yours...

14-01-21

I really believe this.
You count.
If You fail to recognize and value this, life will be so much more difficult than it needs to be.
Erase the negative inner dialogue.
Erase the tapes from the abusive partner or parent.
Erase the old programs. They do not work in these times.
And let go of what drags You down so You may then propel yourself into a thrival mindset...

13-01-21

Being an outlier, or the black sheep of the family it is so key to find support.
Good people could include your therapist, your bestie, your lover, maybe even your neighbour. In these days of rampant projection, there will be those with an agenda. In these days of overt narcissism, there will be those who want to use you.
There may be a fine line between helping another and being used. Protect yourself with healthy and strong boundaries.
Those with good hearts, those that are true-
Without needing anything, will love You just as You are...

12-01-21

Extreme self-care is vital. Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for all your relationships.
Best to be self-ful versus self-less.
A good measure of mindfulness helps too...

11-01-21

So much is happening all at once. On the world's stage, and here at home.
It's easy to measure time by events. Losses. Milestones. Anniversaries. Birthdays.
Allow only certain things as a demarcation of the progress in your life.
Bench marks will come and go. People will come and go.
Grow. Evolve. Forgive.
Love and most of all...choose wisely about that which matters.

10-01-21

Guidance shows up when you are able to notice it.
A lyric from a song.
A line from a poem.
A catch phrase from a movie.
A saying.
A quote.
Life's instruction manual is in you.
Sometimes, all you need is a prompt to inspire your next course of action...

09-01-21

They will tell you who you are. What to do. How to be. Only if you listen...

Having the self confidence to trust your instincts is a muscle you keep developing. There are so many questions, and I found reading books helped me get those answered.
It's easy to trust what everybody says, but it may not be right for you at the moment.
I read alot. Books, social media, magazine articles. Educating oneself helps with personal evolution. Knowing who you are and having the right tools are your disposal are resources that keep on giving. Reading helps you discern the facts from the fiction.
Of course, one must choose wisely as you proceed forward.

08-01-21

I remember living a much different life than this.

In thse days, there was more chaos from my own choices, and of course my interactions with others. There was people pleasing. Trying to reach unattainable standards expected by family, partners, lovers and friends.
For years, it was simply just a way of being.
My life changed with loss of loved ones, betrayal of trusted ones, and recognition that some relationships were so toxic that I was inadvertedly contributing to my own self sabtotage by participating.

Letting go is never easy, until it is.
Grieving what is no longer is normal. Making better choices changes the trajectory.
I am grateful for the journey to get here.
Thrival suits me better. Jumping through hoops to please is definitely a thing of the past...

07-01-21

I like many of you are watching as events unfold.
The disregard for others, the entitlement, the political scene here and over there, and it's all on display for others to see.
There have always been people that make brutally bad choices. There have always been those that strive to do right by others.
As someone who has seen both the evil and the good that men do, I am still paying attention to how others conduct themselves.
The behaviour of others is meant to influence who you are and what life means when we notice.
Then, choose wisely based on all this data.
Wear your mask. Social distance and stay safe...

06-01-21

We need rest. Taking time out for a break is key, for a more peaceful life.
I move towards mindfulness.
After a very challenging season, slowing it down helps. Life is changing all the time.
It's all good...

05-01-21

All those years spent trying to be everything to everybody.
The pandemic has given us a chance to recoonnect with ourselves.
I am grateful for this aspect.

04-01-21

Sometimes we need to remind ourselves of what we once wanted to see if that dream is still viable in these new times.

Is it your desire, or a projection of something someone told you to do?
Family plays a role in this as you were growing up. They may even influence you now, as the old tapes from childhood may be playing in your inner dialogue.
Personal empowerment and having an inventory of your values can help lead you to the next step.

Just be sure your decisions are yours alone. With support, a plan and consistent effort, there is no doubt you can get to where you need to be. Begin now. Where You are.
Read the books. Listen to the podcasts. Take the courses. Change the trajectory of your life...

03-01-21

I was so angry when the new owner decided during the pandemic to evict all tenants and demolish the building. How do I forgive someone who blatently lied to me by saying at the time,
"Don't worry, I will never tear down the building for condos and you can live here forever..." he had said.

When your life is shaken and your sense of security is threatened, the anger is justified.
I thought, I'd be the hold-out and stay put.
What I choose to do instead, was not resist the re-route and began planning my exit.
It was expensive, labour intensive, gruelling in the heat and very challenging. After all it had been eight years there, and forced change never is easy to deal with.

Forgiveness is a form of letting go, but they are not the same thing. To be clear, the purpose of forgiveness is not to let the person who harmed you off the hook, the purpose of forgiveness is to end the grief it has cost you.

And so, I made the move.
10,000 books. 2 cats. Having the help and devotion of my best friend CB, we made it.
I still believe in instant karma, however...

02-01-21

Here's the thing.
Planning makes sense.
Having a map, a compass, an outline or just plain hope can get You to the next stage. Helps if You know where You want to go, or have an inkling of a destination.
You may need to build a tool kit, build a team, acquire resources and take a break from your usual routine to get a sense of what to do.
Begin now.
Get off that road to Nowhere.
Keep moving forward. In tiny increments, even.
Don't wait. Deliberately create your reality.
Manifest destiny, as only You know how...

01-01-21

With this New Year, let's change our mindsets and build a better life for yourself.

I am not pizza. I can not please everyone.
The people I used to let influence me, no longer hold sway.
It's not that I don't believe them, it's mostly having discovered I have outgrown that way of being. Their way of being.
Sure, we all want to belong. Need a tribe.
Yet, there are times when one must let go of the old beliefs, the old behaviours and lean into a more evolved version of who You are.
Times like now...
Reinvent what you can.
Let go of the old ways. Outliers know things others do not...